Thursday, April 8, 2010

Telstra Conclusion

Hi All,

I came across a few old comments that said I hadn't concluded the Telstra saga. Lo and Behold, they were right. It's quite old now so it's not gonna have the detail that my other posts did, but here's the gist.

They did in fact write off the amount. Though to say it was as simple as that would not do this finale any justice whatsoever.

So what the geniuses (genii?) at Telstra did was take Account A) that was in debit to the tune of $1800 odd (due to the wrong charges) and do absofuckinglutely nothing with it. They then created Account B) and credited it for $1800!

I'm a simple fella and I'd a thought you'd just frikkin' credit the original account back to zero, but clearly I'm a dumb fuck and have no clue what I'm talking about. So, I rang Telstra to see how I go about resolving this conundrum. The moron on the line tells me I need to pay the account in debit. I just roll my eyes and tell her to check the other account. She informs me its in credit. I told her that I no longer have any Telstra services, so I'd like them to transfer the credit from one account to the other.

They can't do that.

I tell her I want her to send me a cheque for the $1800. (I then won't pay the account in credit, will be rich beyond my wildest dreams and will leave the country!)

They can't do that either!

I asked her why not and no word of a lie she tells me that even though they are two completely separate accounts (and she can tell this new account in credit has never had services attached to it) they can't issue a cheque while another account in the same name is in debit...

I asked her how I would solve this particular problem seeing as they won't transfer and they won't issue a cheque so I can pay the debit account. She couldn't tell me. Never come across the problem... She offered to put me through to a supervisor. I declined.

I made one further phone call to get this resolved.

I called The Ombudsman.

Telstra magically fixed the problem.

The End.

P.S. One little kicker is that years ago I set up a Telstra faxstream. So my faxes go through Telstra (no clue which account) and get sent to my email address. I cancelled my services what? 2 and a half years ago now?

Those faxes still come through!!! Every time I get an email that says it's from faxstream.telstra.com I chuckle and remember what a bunch if incompetent cunts they are.

Good day!